I guess I should be dealing with a sort of
"guess you never know what you got til its gone" type situation.
But I'm not.
I don't even know what I'm dealing with.
I'm so pissed off,
unnecessarily upset,
And trying to deal with my own fucking double standards and personal equivocation and paradoxical nature I can't even stand to look at myself in the mirror.
I'm just as bad as you.
I'm as bad as the rest of them.
I've turned into this INCREDIBLE BITCH.
I don't even know where it came from.
I can't help but think that maybe its my own boredom.
Maybe I'm looking for drama.
Even though I say I'm trying to stay away from it.
How can I even think about this shit?
How can I think that I? ME? Clodagh fucking Shortall can even THINK, yet alone pontificate about these depts of human flaws, to think about these lows and highs, in a different way?
Somone has said it better before me.
and I'm personally lost for words.
For once.
I just want to shut my fat mouth,
Lie in bed,
And stay there forever.
Keep my friends away from me.
I'll only fuck everyone up. Or at least piss them off LOADS.
In basic words.
I've fallen.
Again.
And now your not here.
Again.
Clodagh out _
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